Many things about church are so good and bring me such life, love and laughter! Countless relationships, incredible support, and help along my faith journey are all a regular part of my life because I am involved in the church. Church, like every other family I'm a part of, has brought me the most pain and the most joy in my life. I am able to get paid, use my spiritual gifts and work meaningful on faith matters because of the church. Though I am sometimes tempted, I don't think I will ever abandon the church. Though I know it has many faults - I will not succomb to the temptation to continually criticise or live with an aloof cynicism regarding it. I am committed to not complaining about the church or generalizing what "Christians" believe (at least not on my blog :)). So, I start with me and face up to some hard truths (just 3 for now). Truths that my actions, not my words are revealing. Someone once said, "Your emphasis is your message." I'm looking and listening carefully to the last ten years of ministry emphasis and I'm getting my message.
1. I confess to being a Christian who is more obsessed with the church than it's founder. If I follow the trail of my time, energy and focus I find that they often lead me to a throne that contains not a risen Lord but a pragmatic institution. Some of this has to do with my job and things that need to get done and some of it has to do with the desire to please others rather than Christ - taking the earthly reward instead of waiting for the heavenly.
2. I enjoy singing and playing worship songs more than worshipping with them.
3. More of my time is spent in running the church than in making disciples. As it is today, I do my best to make the church run and do well and I really pray that disciples are the by-product. Too much about monument, not enough about movement or mission.
I am committed to change. So in the past couple of months I have been making some daily faith commitments - prayers actually - that go something like this:
1. I will continually remind myself, and those that I have influence with, that I am in the disciple multiplication ministry. I will lead in a way that reveals that this local church exists first of all to make disciples. Which means that transforming lives is the goal - not filling progam slots or auditorium seats. It may sound like a subtle shift but if you work in a church you can already imagine numerous implications :)
2. I won't allow my job, my love for the church, or the expectations of others to hinder my passionate following. I want to be a follower first.
This is awesome, Steve. My heart resonates.
Posted by: Darryl Dash | February 24, 2004 at 18:45
As does mine.
Posted by: ed | February 24, 2004 at 20:25